Many women are single for a lot of reasons and it’s not just because they are waiting for the right person to come along. Some are single because they just want to be free of the responsibilities that relationships bring.
“I vowed very early in life that marriage and kids weren’t for me,” said Paula P, 35.
“I couldn’t see myself settling down with just one partner, and the career and travel plans I had just didn’t include a steady partner and children.”
The business executive said she managed to ward off many potential suitors, but though she managed to stay single, she became pregnant accidentally and is now a mother.
“I love my son, but the thoughts of all I could be doing still come to my head sometimes,” she said. “I’m still not interested in traditional partnership through marriage, but circumstances have of course made me warmer to the idea of more children in future.”
The constant need to check in with a mate at various points throughout the day can wear people down. When you’re single you don’t have to worry about all these things, you can come and go as you like, you get to focus on yourself and anything you want to do — it’s all about you.
“Many people don’t understand why some women would choose to be single, but coupling up is not for everybody,” says counsellor David Anderson. “In fact, many people hold this view, but get married to satisfy an obligation they feel to their families or society to continue the family line.”
In fact, being single has many benefits that don’t come with matrimony.
These include:
1. You stand a better chance of saving money. There is no dipping in your pockets for going to the movies, gifts and dinners. When you’re single you will find yourself with money to spend on that comfy mattress and pillow to sleep on. You will get a good night’s sleep by being alone, with no one tossing, turning and snoring beside you all night.
2. When you’re single you can be free to do as you please, with no one watching your every move or watching what you’re posting on social media. You can eat all your comfort food without someone hanging over your shoulder telling you it’s bad for your health. You have no one to clean up after, and you can make a mess of the house as there is no one to argue with about it.
3. You don’t have to worry about feeling obligated to do things with your significant other’s family. It’s bad enough that you have to put up with your own dysfunctional family, why put yourself in a position to deal with someone else’s? You also don’t have to feel obligated to love their hair-shedding pets or ill-mannered kids.
4. You don’t have to worry about pregnancy scares or your partner sleeping around. You also don’t have to worry about someone else’s emotions while coping with your own sanity.
To be honest, being single is like being in a relationship — a relationship with yourself where the focus is all about you loving you.